Ancient Greece - Afternoon Delight
"We take a hetaera for our
pleasure, a concubine for daily attention to our physical wants, a wife
to give us legitimate children and a respected house.”
Demosthenes, On Wives & Hetaerae, c. 350 BCE
In Hellenistic Greece, circa 700- 300
BCE, this was the general consensus concerning the role of women in a
man’s society. However there is another side to this type of
classification in any society. Plato wrote his immense description of a
perfect society (utopia) where philosophers were kings and women were
warriors if so suited to the part.
Because of society’s view of the
behavior of the gods, sex was considered by men to be essential to
pleasing the ribald gods and keeping mighty Zeus happy. Zeus, as father
to all gods, never made the grade in the arena of monogamy to Hera.
Anything in a woman’s toga was fair game to him. He disguised himself
as a bull among other things to have sex with goddesses and maidens
alike. Hera, as Zeus’s wife and Goddess of the Home and things
womanly, knew of his dalliances and kept a close eye via her network of
deities. However, because of society’s view of the wife/mother role,
she could say nothing overt. She found other ways. Her anger and
bitterness often caused consternation among the pantheon of the ancient
Greek world. Zeus, in his infinite wisdom, generally nodded and muttered
“yes dear” as Hera dressed him down. And then went merrily about the
business of trying every woman within site of Mount Olympus.
To understand the mind of the ancient
Greek, (and trust that it is a very difficult thing to do) you must
understand their gods. For in the deities of Mount Olympus ranged a vast
stretch of personalities, powers and temperament. They were nothing like
the staid and stoic god of the Christians, nor did they resemble
anything close to the elders of the Old Testament. Allah is simply a
mystery, short of the truths according to Islam that He set upon
Mohammed to scribe. The eastern beliefs are far more serene and
non-complex in their philosophies and the earth religions and native
beliefs kept the entire process of spirituality to spiritual growth in
harmony with nature.
The Greek pantheon were a sordid bunch.
Lust, greed, power, deceit, and dishonesty made up the essence of
conversation at the feasting table of Zeus and Hera. The gods displayed
all of the human traits and in a far superior manner. They did it all in
a more grand style, often creating the impression to lowly humans that
this type of behavior and temperament were sanctioned.
Men, of course, were far the superiors
in the Hellenistic society. Women were owned, obliged, ignored or paid
for. There were classes of prostitution as well. The lower classes
barely had space to entertain their clients. The upper class of
companions was expensive and brought status to the males who purchased
them. As was often the case, married men kept a mistress and companion
(hetaera) in lush quarters with full allowance. They were of course
expected to be at hand whenever their patron wished it.
And so the wives played. They spent
hours on hair and face. Chose their wardrobe with intense care and
stripped their day planners of appointments. Wives of ancient Greece
cultivated the company of writers, philosophers and artists. Each was
thought by their husbands to be unworthy of attention and knowing what
awaited them near the Senate House, happily left their wives to whatever
entertainment she had planned. Of course, should an associate or peer
catch rumor of his wife’s dalliances, the husband took severe action.
Often to the point of divorce.
The wives were careful and often had
slaves or freed servants within their home who protected their
mistress’s reputation outside of the estate. History alludes to
afternoon gatherings of quiet pursuit of intellectual stimulation. But
history also gives us pieces and short essays of the goings on at these
gatherings. Two attending guests or the hostess and a guest would slip
quietly away and return a short while later, fastening a shoulder
broach. Gender was not an issue at these events. Homophobia was
practically unheard of in Hellenistic Greece. Lesbian relations and gay
male coupling was merely a part of society. Many men preferred a gay
lifestyle. The wives often spent time with only other wives and lesbian
activity went with the menu and music.
So the wives had fun. Under the
restrictive attitudes of an ancient world, where gods could philander
and goddess could seduce, human men had few restrictions. They were
expected by the gods to emulate them. Women, however, were not expected
to act as goddesses unless they were paid or expected to do so by the
husbands who kept them. Wives had no choice but to keep secret their
afternoons. Hermes, who guarded the doorways and gates of ancient Greek
homes is depicted in statuary and art as only a head and genitals. A
fitting guardian for husbands to leave behind.
Copyright - 2001